The Wonders of Science!

Wow! OK! Nice!

This is science, and also what a cheeseball looks like to me when I am filled with rage.

Science is so wonderful, isn’t it? The study of the world. “A closer look” at things. What regular people might think of as slacking off at work, scientists do to help us understand what the hell is going on around here.

Take the cell, for instance. Every living thing is made up of cells, including that prize pig at the county fair that you can’t seem to get out of your mind. Also plants.

A scientist named Dr. Elmore Ferrier discovered the existence of the cell when he ran into one at a bar in Hoboken. He gave it his number at the end of the night but it never called. Such is life. Ships passing in the night and what not.

We know now of course that microscopes let you see cells, but I wouldn’t recommend it. Upsetting little things, a lot of little blobs and squiggles. You’d hate the idea that there are so many wiggling around and what not. Best to ignore them.

This is how I accidentally gave an entire team of vaccine developers pinkeye.

What else can science show us? Hmm. Let’s think. Electricity! Of course. Ever see that glass orb that makes your hair stand up when you touch it? How annoying is that? Who asked for that? Great way to ruin your hair, if you ask me. I guess sometimes science can be…