I don’t trust myself to not cheat at Scrabble.

Trusting Yourself

r.j. kushner
3 min readMay 2, 2023

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Hello and thank you for clicking on another edition of Extreme Meditation For Winning. I’m your guest blogger, Dr. Ryan Kushner. I am an actor, surgeon and New York Times Best Selling Author reader.

Today I’m going to be talking about trusting yourself. As many people know, it’s not always easy to trust yourself, especially if it’s 10 p.m. and there’s half a cheesecake in the fridge that you’re “saving for tomorrow.”

Sometimes a lack of trust boils down to a lack of self confidence. Maybe you made a mistake in the past that shook your confidence in yourself. Maybe you were driving a clown car late at night and heard a honka-honka but never looked back; or maybe you got a fade haircut.

Speaking personally, which I am often advised against doing, I stopped trusting myself after spending a year trying to cook every recipe in Julia Child’s “My Life In France,” only to to find out later that it’s actually her memoir and not a cookbook at all.

I originally got the idea to cook all of Julia’s recipes from an Amy Adams movie. It’s called “Arrival” and it’s about squid aliens who “arrival” on earth. I was really hungry after watching it because I kept vomiting whenever it showed the aliens. They repulsed me.

I found Julia Child’s book on my shelf and immediately had the idea of cooking all the recipes. I figured I’d give myself a year since that’s how long it usually takes me to read one book. Well, after 12 months of struggling to cook anything written in there, I realized my mistake (that it wasn’t a cookbook) and felt like a real asshole. I felt like a real big, stupid asshole. How could I ever trust myself again?

The answer? Force (Extreme Meditation Mindgem #209). I decided I would eat 100 dried apricots and then get into an crowded elevator at work and trust myself not to blame my co-worker Geoff every time I broke wind. Ultimately, however, I couldn’t bring myself to take the fall and blamed Geoff immediately for the noxious stench. I also pressed the emergency stop button and convinced everyone in the elevator to banish Geoff to the roof for his foul deeds.

It felt nice to lead a mob and I gained a lot of self confidence before we all passed out from the fumes together.

I trust this dog not to eat my face while I’m asleep. It’s time I started trusting myself not to do the same.

I hope this story inspires you to start trusting yourself more. Life is a downward spiral, and if I’ve learned anything it’s that you certainly can’t trust your barber to talk you out of getting a fade haircut. So, why not trust yourself?

My MediTation ChaLLenge (™) for you is to download three sports betting apps by the end of the day and see what happens. Trust yourself. There’s nothing to worry about and it may just be the best thing you’ve ever done in your life.

Thank you for reading Extreme Mediation for Winning, the go-to meditation blog for helping you give your mind a piece of your mind. See you next time.

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r.j. kushner

Dubbed by the New York Times as “all out of free articles this month.”